For those of you keeping track, yesterday was my four-year “cancerversary.” Four years since I heard the words, “You have cancer.” Four years. In some ways it seems like forever ago and in other ways it feels like yesterday. While my mastectomy scars have faded with time, cancer has certainly left an indelible mark on me. I try to find the joy in the little moments. I try not to jump to the immediate conclusion that “it’s back” at even the smallest ache or pain. I try to reflect on the many ways that I have been so fortunate in my cancer experience. But sometimes I still get really mad. Why did this happen to me? Why do so many people I know have to deal with this? Why does this bring so much pain and suffering to the people I love? Why do my daughters at the age of 7 and 9 know so much about cancer and illness? It’s not fair.
But I can’t change my circumstances. I can’t change the fact that my cells “went rogue” and infiltrated my breasts. I treated the illness, but I can only continue to treat the fear and anxiety that will always stand waiting at the back of my mind. However, I can take my experience and use it to try to help others. I can control that portion of my life. As most of you know, Consano means “to heal” in Latin. Creating and growing Consano has helped me to continue to heal every day. Meeting each of you and hearing your stories fuels my passion, and helps to push aside my own fear. I so deeply wish that we didn’t have these stories to share, but since we do, and we can’t change that fact, let’s channel that into a force for good because we can control that!